Women appreciate defined relationships
Published: Wednesday, January 30, 2013
Updated: Wednesday, January 30, 2013 23:01
We all know dating sucks. It’s not a secret. For starters, there are no clear boundaries on what constitutes a friendship versus what constitutes a more serious dating relationship. Then, we single adults make it worse by not talking about where a relationship stands.
Not long ago at Utah State University there was a viral YouTube video asking several students whether or not girls and guys can be friends. The answer was no. I’m looking at all my ladies right now. The answer is no. Accept it.
If you’re like most people, you have probably kissed or cuddled with most of your close “friends,” who are members of the opposite sex.
My mother once told me kissing and/or cuddling is supposed to be something you do with people you are actually interested in dating — not your friends. So don’t go around kissing people you do not want to date. You are only making your dating life worse by sending mixed signals. It isn’t worth it.
Now pay attention fellas, you make the problem worse by never actually asking girls out. You think that “hanging out” is good enough. It’s not. Hanging out a few times before you ask her out in order to take the pressure off and make sure she is actually worth taking on a date is totally fine.
After that, man up. Ask her out on a real date. Ladies, do not say yes to a date you do not want to go on. If you know you aren’t interested, you are wasting your time and his time and money.
OK, so you’ve managed to get a few dates with the same person. Nice job. Now it’s time to determine the relationship. No one wants to bring up the DTR because it’s terrifying.
No one wants to appear more eager than the other party involved. We all think that eagerness comes off as either craziness, desperation, or both.
Everyone is scared they will destroy their chances of ever getting to the serious relationship status by DTR-ing too early. By avoiding the conversation, we all end up in awkward dating limbo. Open up, be honest and tell the people you are interested in how you feel. Rejection sucks, but so does dating, and the only way out of dating is marriage. Suck it up. Go out and have real-life, defined dating relationships.
Taylor Stucki is a single senior from Midvale, Utah. She plans to eventually get a master’s degree in Psychology, but for now is enjoying all of the aspects of college; except for dating. She’s the sister of Statesman news editor Tavin Stucki, but is reluctant to disclose that information. Send comments to firstname.lastname@example.org